french:

I’m so fucking weird
It’s like:
I’m the nicest rude person you’ll ever meet.
I don’t give a fuck about anything but at the same time, I care about a lot.
I hate people but I want to be everyone’s friend.
I hate myself but I’m completely fabulous.
I need help.

fruitpacks:

meeting peoples moms for the first time is so intimidating because i cant tell if theyre a strict mom or a laid back mom and as i ride in their car i have to slowly figure out what breed of mom they are

  • 16 year old child: mom, dad: I'm gay/lesbian/bi/pan
  • Straight parents: you're too young to know what your sexuality is! It's just a phase.
  • Baby boy: *stares at a baby girl for no reason other than the fact that babies stare at everything*
  • Straight parents: oooh! Ladies man! We're gonna have to keep the girls offa you!